Cold Life
by Sodapop'sBabe
Summary: 2 months after Dallas Winston&Johnnycake's death, the gang learns to cope with their sadness&moves on, but not Ponyboy Curtis, Can someone save him in time or will he live in regret? Story is better than the Summary please read and review!
1. Prologue Ch: 1

**Cold Life**

It was a rainy evening in Tulsa when the grave diggers were finished digging Dallas Winston's grave as his casket was lowered in the ground. Ponyboy, Soda, Darry, Two-Bit and Steve looked down and choked on a sob; their fierce friend been taken away from them when Johnny died at the hospital and ran away to robbed a drug store and getting shot 7 times from the cops. Ponyboy was taking the hardest pain than the rest of the gang. By the next 7 months everyone was moving on except for Pony, the pain the visibly there like it had been yesterday when the two friends died.


	2. Reliving the Nightmares

_**Reliving the Nightmare**_

_Pony Pov:_

"_Dally don't!" I screamed so loud over the rain, the gang was running towards the park where Dallas Winston was running from the cops. With his unloaded gun he pointed it at the police then looked at me for the last time. His eyes told me he was sorry, sorry for everything he ever done, but there was love in his eyes that stood out toward me, I started crying as he looked sad but had a grin on. Dallas Winston wasn't afraid of death, oh no he wasn't, he was afraid of what would happen to Johnny and me; he told me when we went to the hospital after the rumble just before Johnny died. But now he knew it was the end for him, as 7 shots fired. BANG, BANG, BANG! "No!" I screamed as he hit the pavement with words forming on his bloodstained pale lips making me strain to hear as I kneeled closer to him. "Ponyboy, I love ya kid" he whispered as I shivered and screamed over and over again as he closed his eyes and his final breath stopped. Dallas was dead all because I went to save the kids in the burning church with Johnny trailing behind me and shoving me out the window because a beam with gonna fall but Johnny took the pain and he died because of me saving the kids. Both of my friends died because of me._

Someone was shaking me roughly and kept yelling in my ear, I wish they stopped it hurts too much. "Ponyboy wake up, you're having a nightmare. Ow quit slashing at me!" Someone said, as I peeled my eyes open, and found my brother Soda was staring at me. "Just…a nightmare" I panted and felt tears down my cheeks, and I pushed myself up into sitting position.

"Was it about Dally again Pone?" my brother asked gently, he knew that I was greatly in sorrow when Dally and Johnny died, it hurt me so bad that I had nightmares like this one every night, but mostly about Dallas for some reason. I shook my head yes and looked at the clock beside my bed, it was 10am on a Saturday morning, Darry would be up by now making breakfast. Soda kept looking me over, my almost brown hair was back but was longer than before, my eyes were sunken and dark around the skin, and my body was pale, all because I refused to eat sometimes but then get food shoved in my mouth from Darry. "C'mon Pony you wanna eat something?" Soda asked me and I shook my head no, I made a head gesture of wanting something to drink. He nodded and I slithered off my bed and went to the kitchen where Darry found me searching the fridge for something to drink.

"Hey Pone, how are you feeling? Want some breakfast" Darry asked me, I backed up shaking my head again, no, why people can't see that I Ponyboy Curtis don't want to eat anything right now! Like holy crap, I just want something to drink for my perched lips. "You okay Pony? You're looking paler than before." Darry said as he looked me over just like Soda, as he came around the table and laid a hand on my forehead as I flinched back. "Yeah, I'm alright Dar, now can you leave me alone for Pete's sake!" I snapped making Darry put his hand down, sometimes I don't give a shit when it comes to concern about my health, Darry was gonna make a comment when Two-Bit came in along with Steve. "Good Lordly what happen here? It is true the famous Ponyboy Curtis is alive and walking?" Two-Bit joked around as Steve laughed and he seen me freeze. "Go away Two-Bit you're annoying, go eat your chocolate cake." I murmured and Two-Bit had me in a headlock and was wrestling on the floor. To be honest I felt weak and unsteady, and before I realized it, I collapsed and Two-Bit fell flat on my chest. "Get off of me!" I gasped as I couldn't move and Darry tackled Two-Bit.

_Darry's Pov:_

Ponyboy, been acting strange like ever since Dally died he been distance and cold. He'd been waking up screaming and crying from his nightmares, they were pretty intense, like last time, he punched me square in the jaw when I tried waking him up. I love my baby brother; enough that I will do anything to stop his nightmares from draining him of energy and making him fragile. I asked him more than once if he wanted to eat all week but he said no, I threaten him to eat something or I'm not letting him out of the house, then he ate some food but I can't keep forcing him. Sometimes I think Ponyboy is depressed but I don't see the signs, maybe I do but I choose to ignore it. But the minute Pony collapsed under Two-Bit is when I took action. "Ponyboy!" I yelled as I sprang and knocked Two-Bit off my baby brother, it looked like he couldn't move, but he pushed himself up and ran to his room, slamming it in progress. "Dar what happened?" Soda asked me as he looked confused as I did. "I don't know little buddy" I said, feeling more confused at Pony's behaviour. "Lemme talk to the kid" Two-Bit said as he felt a little guilty for hurting Pony. I shook my head, maybe Pony would open up to Two-Bit because we tried everything to make him talk, so far nothing worked. So Two-Bit took off to Pony's room.

_Two-Bit's Pov:_

I didn't mean to squish the kid but, man he looked worse than before! Like I'm talking the lack of fighting and his body didn't look good either, not that I swing that way, but c'mon the kid is sick and no one is bothering with it. But when I caught the kid in a headlock he seemed to have his energy there but then he gave up under me like a sack of potatoes! Superman ended up tackling me and then Ponyboy gets up and slams his door to his room, like he's angry at the world! Well Imma going to talk to that kid and make sure he's alright.

Instead of knocking on the door like the gentleman I am, I opened the door to find young Ponyboy crying his eyes out like it was the day…no I must've say their names, it is bad enough Pony can't handle it. Hey wait a sec, this is the reason why Pony is the way he is…it's because Dallas and his best friend died, I'm such an idiot, boy never thought I call myself an ass, me Two-Bit Matthews an ass.

"Hey Ponyboy, look I'm sorry for tackling you…hey there what's with the tears?" I said concerning for the fact that he is crying like a storm. "I…I miss Dallas" choked Pony as he cried harder. "_Hmmm the kid is crying because he misses Dally? That's strange because normally he'll cry about Johnny" I_ thought as he kid kept crying, maybe there's another reason why he is so sad. "Hey Pone…do you love Dally?" I asked thinking maybe the kid was different if you know what I mean but I didn't see the fist that collided into my jaw, Ponyboy was glaring at me fiercely. "I. Am. Not. Gay." He yelled as his face got red and he punctuated his words by kicking me in the stomach. Aw fuck that hurts that little piece of shit; hey wait a minute why is he getting stronger like Dallas? Oh no, he can't be turning into him, anything but that; I won't be able to handle another Dallas Winston. I pressed the matter; "Are you sure you're okay?" But I got kicked again, this time yelling because he kicked me harder in the ribs, shit that's gonna bruise. I caught the kid's foot and slammed him on the floor and force him the stay still. Unfortunately he didn't and started thrashing around and screaming Dally and the gang's name, whoa maybe the kid just loves Dally and looked up to him, hmm maybe, I should tell Superman this when he comes in. The gang came crashing into the bedroom, Soda snagged me off Ponyboy and Darry went to his baby brother, who was crying like a mad house rocking back and forth with his arms around his knees. "Pony why can't you tell me why you are so upset?" asked Darry as he stood in front of Ponyboy and I could see his shoulders shake from the sobs that ripped through his throat. His response was so heartbreaking I thought I Two-Bit Matthews would tear up. "I miss Dally; I miss him so much that I want to die! I can't take it anymore; it's my fault that Johnny and Dally died. It's my fault I went to save those kids from the burning church! I love Dally" he sobbed as he buried his face in his hands, shaking with grief. Soda looked pale from hearing his baby brother talk, then he gotten angry when he blamed himself for their deaths, Darry's voice boomed across the house, I nearly jumped outta my skin. "PONYBOY MICHAEL CURTIS DON'T YOU DARE BLAME YOURSELF FOR JOHNNY AND DALLAS' DEATH IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT!" He yelled at him, seeing the kid flinch back and bawled even harder. "I just can't stand it; I want Dally and Johnny back!" Pony said as he coughed through his tears. "Pone, want some aspirin to help with your headache?" Superman asked him as he went to the kitchen and came back with two pills and a glass of water. Damn, I'm in need of a beer and some blondes right now, it ain't so savvy when you're watching a 14 year old kid break down in front of you, so I spoke my departure. "Sorry ya'll but I'm going to hunt some action, Stevie boy you with me, blondes and beer at Bucks?" I said making a show as I always do. "Sure sounds good" Steve replied, and out both of us left from the dramatic House of Commons where the Curtis family was sitting in the living room.

_Soda Pov:_

Golly, I never seen Ponyboy so worked up about Dally and Johnny's death. When he said he loved Dallas I was shocked I mean I knew my brother loved someone but Dally? I was shocked to hear, and then I heard Pony yell "I. Am. Not. Gay." Steve sniggered, I punched him in the arm angrily then heard Two-Bit grunt in I'm assuming in pain, 'cause I know how hard Pony can kick and throw a punch when he's angry, I heard Ponyboy holler for us. Steve, me and Darry rushed to our shared bedroom and found Two-Bit on top of Ponyboy who was thrashing and screaming Dallas' name like someone shot him. So I snagged Two-Bit off Ponyboy and Darry went to him, who was crying like a mad house. "Pony why can't you tell me why you are so upset?" asked Darry as he stood in front of Ponyboy and I could see my brothers shoulders shake from the sobs that ripped through his throat. His response was so heartbreaking I thought me and Two-Bit would tear up. "I miss Dally; I miss him so much that I want to die! I can't take it anymore; it's my fault that Johnny and Dally died. It's my fault I went to save those kids from the burning church! I love Dally" he sobbed as he buried his face in his hands, shaking with grief. I paled from hearing my baby brother talk, then I gotten angry when he blamed himself for their deaths, Darry's voice boomed across the house, I nearly jumped outta my skin along with Two-Bit. "PONYBOY MICHAEL CURTIS DON'T YOU DARE BLAME YOURSELF FOR JOHNNY AND DALLAS' DEATH IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT!" He yelled at him, seeing the kid flinch back and bawled even harder. "I just can't stand it; I want Dally and Johnny back! I'm nothing without Dallas around and Johnny not being with me" Pony said as he coughed through his tears. It broke my heart to see Pony so depressed, like am I the only person in this gang that sees Pony depressed? I gotta tell Dar this, I picked up Ponyboy and him to the living room while the rest of the gang left, me Darry and Pony were silent for a couple of minutes then Darry spoke. "Pone, are you sure you're okay? I mean your wellbeing. You haven't been the same since "the day" and we are getting worried about you! Your schoolwork is going down and don't think I don't know about that Ponyboy Michael Curtis" Dar said with the serious deadness in his voice as he spoke to our little brother. Pony looked like he wanted to be anywhere but here at the moment, as he sighed and looked at me. "Dallas was everything to me, he was my protector and my friend. He died because of Johnny, and Johnny died because he followed me in the burning church to save the kids, it's my fault that they died and I'll never forgive myself for what happened" he said as he looked down and yawned again. "Can I go to bed Dar? I'm tired and want sleep, I promise I'll finish my homework later when I wake up" Pony said with tiredness clear in his voice as his chin dipped low and before me and Darry knew it Ponyboy fell asleep. "Little buddy why don't you take Pony to his room and I will go make an appointment with Doctor Glass" Darry said as I picked up Ponyboy and gently laid him on the bed and covered him up. "Darry do you think it's a good idea? I mean I don't think Ponyboy would like this…" I said with unease as I imagine my baby brother seeing a psychologist. "It'll be good for Pony especially if he have been having these dreams." Superman said as he put down the phone, and stood up walking toward the door. "Soda I have to go to work today only for a few hours I'll be back by 9pm okay little man" Darry said as he ruffled my hair and waved goodbye. "Alright bye Dar" I said, turning on the television and jumped on the couch, I hope Pony gets better soon; I love my baby brother and will do anything to save him.

_Third person point of view:_

As he watched the Curtis house with interest, he wondered if he should make his appearance; after all he was Dallas Winston's twin brother Kyle Winston, the second most badass hood from New York. He have been blessed with the same facial and body structure as his infamous brother and now since he found out that Dally died and a particular redhead was in sorrow of his death, he decided it was best to come to the town where things were about to get more interesting with Kyle Tom Winston spreading his name.


	3. Dallas has a Twin!

_Third person point of view:_

The sun was setting lower into the Friday sky as Dallas' gang headed toward the movie house; he wondered what will the gang think of him and more particularly the redhead who loved his brother. Would he think that it is Dallas from the dead? Or will he grow to love him as did his brother? Those questions clawed at Kyle's mind as he headed closer but stay a distant away so the gang doesn't see him, but he kept walking to the movies. He saw the redhead boy move his head toward his way and ducked behind a bush.

_Pony's Pov_

I thought I felt a pair of eyes on me when the gang was walking to the movie house for a Friday night movie night, but when I turned around no one was there but I had a feeling it was either Johnny or Dally watching over me keeping me outta trouble, gosh I miss 'em a tonne, but I knew I have to move on even if it kills me more inside. When I woke up this morning, I felt different, I dunno how but I felt a little more alive today than usual. Dar made breakfast and told me the news that I was gonna go see a Psychologist for my dreams, which of course I fought back at him saying that I didn't need no stinking lady asking me what my thoughts are about my dreams, I mean I know some of the dreams are freaky and make me cry out in pain but I am fine now! But of course I lost the battle.

_Flashback_

"_Ponyboy there's something I have to discuss with you" my brother had said with the edge in his voice that he uses when he's concerned about me. "What's wrong Dar?" I had said feeling a little scared because I didn't know what was going on, of course Darry looked actually sad a bit, I wonder why. "Well Pone, I know you've been having some pretty intense dreams, and I felt concerned so I called Diane your therapist, and booked a couple of appointments for ya so please don't get all angry with me Pony, I'm doing this for you " Darry spoke as his voice lead to finality. I surrendered and looked down, I knew I wasn't gonna win but maybe it'll help me. _

_End on flashback_

After that argument Darry felt that we all needed to go out together to the movies to have fun, so we all went out and not a Soc was in site so far so were okay. Soda was talking to Two-Bit about some blondes he'd seen at the DX, and a couple of them were real dolls. Steve walked silently beside Soda, unspeaking, Darry walked like a warrior; his arms taunt and his blue eyes clear and hard. My brothers are both good looking but I don't say so myself that I'm that bad, but if I told my brothers that I like guys it'll make them lose respect for me; all well I think Soda knows already.

Soda Pov:

So I was talking to Two-Bit about blondes when I noticed that Ponyboy stopped for a second and then kept walking. _Hmm that's weird why did Pone stop and then continue walking? _I thought in wonder about Pony's wellbeing again. Dar looked back at the rest of the gang and the look in his eyes told us that we need to stick together; there were Socs everywhere at the drive in. Steve and I went to the diner to grab our grub and drinks; I could see Ponyboy and Two-Bit talking sitting in the seats watching previews. A Paul Newman movie was playing tonight and it was Ponyboy's favourite character and movies. Darry was walking toward Pony and Two-Bit and took his seat beside them to be honest I'm glad Darry is with us and watching a movie, it feels like we are getting back together. But I have a feeling someone is watching us, so I turned around and stared at the guy I thought that had died...

(cliff hanger)

_duh duh duh dummm _  
><em>So sorry I haven't updated in forever everybody :( please don't hate me! Been very busy these past months with summer, school, sports, boys yada yada lol, anyway please rate and leave a review makes me smile :) <em>

_xxx MyChemRomanceGirl_


	4. authors note :

*******AUTHORS NOTEE*****

i'm sorry everyone for not updating another chapter :( Between sports, family, and hospital trips I haven't had time to update :( Right now I'm kinda in writer's block and I want to ask you lovely readers if you can give me ideas c: you'll be mentioned in the end of the chappy promise :) i hope everyone won't be mad at me so I hope you all forgive me

*leaves cookies for everyone*

Ciao Sodapop'sBabe


	5. When He Died

**_Flashback... Kyle's ._**

_I get a call after midnight from my twin brother saying it was all over for him, he had lost his best friend and nearly his boyfriend too after the rumber they were in from the jackass Socials. All I felt was fear, sadness and surprised. Fear because I can only imagine what my twin brother had done when this tragic of his beloved friend passing. Sadness because I didnt want to lose Dallas, he was the only person who cared about me besides the gang I used to be in. Then surprised because he didn't think about his boyfriend about what he was doing because he would stop to think about the people he loved first before getting in trouble, but it had been 3 years since I last seen him, and he could've changed his ways._

**_*coversation*_**

**_Kyle: Hello, whose this? Ya better not be some jackass selling me shit!_**

**_Dallas: Kyle its me, listen...I needa tell ya something. I'm in a jam but it's all over for me man. My buddy...Joh-Johnnycake died and I lost it man! I robbed a convenience store and the police are af'ta me, My gang is coming to try to hide me but I know that I'm gonna die, I'm not afraid of it either but my boyfriend Pon-Ponyboy Curtis will be depressed about all this...I need you to keep an eye out for him... please I love you Kyle, protect Pony please._**

**_Kyle: Okay Dallas. _**

**_*conversation ends*_**

_I packed my belongings in my ratty suitcase which were my ripped up jeans, shoes, hair grease, a couple of knives, a picture of Dally and me, and ten pack of kools. I put on my tight black shirt and thrown on my black worn leather jacket and ran out the door to my 1950's midnight blue t-bird. I gunned the engine and teared out onto the streets of New York and drove like a mad man on the loose, seemingly that my brother is going to die and he was my only family left. After 22 hours of driving and not making any stops I finally reached Tusla, but by then I knew that Dallas died and anger found its way to my fists and i got out of my car and stopped at this place called Bucks, the smell of beer, cigarette's and perfume stunk up the air like choking black poison, I grimised but went in and found the owner and demanded to know the address that of his boyfriends, the owner was shocked because he thought I was Dallas and gone all doped up. I acted, saying I was Dally and then stoked off to my car and went to this abanden house and slept before wondering what to do later about this mess._

_*Authors note*_

_I would like to thank FWAFAwriter for giving me the idea about doing Kyle's P.O.V about Dallas' death. I have another chapter I will put up maybe next week because I still need to go over it and I'm feeling kind of down today and don't feel good enough to put it up :( I hope everyone likes this chapter/filler if it needs more work PM me and Ill get to it. If I made any mistakes please please tell me and I'll fix them. I written this at 1 this morning and I hope it doesnt sound confusing, sorry if it does :( anyway R&R thank ya :)_

_Ciao Sodapop'sBabe_


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